Can you escape the friend zone?

Lauren Hernandez

According to Urban Dictionary the friend zone is when “a girl decides that you are her friend, you’re no longer a dating option. You become this complete non-sexual entity in her eyes, like her brother, or a lamp.”

Of course this also goes for when a guy friend zones a girl. I do have to say that I am a strong believer that when someone is in the friend zone they tend to stay there. This isn’t always the case of course; this is just how it seems to usually be. Now is there a way to escape said friend zone?

I know plenty of guys that have nothing particularly wrong with them, but they are in the friend zone because there just isn’t that connection or anything else beyond friendship. Someone can be attractive, nice, smart, and funny but the only thing lacking is that spark or those butterflies when you are with them.

I personally have guy friends that I sometimes think to myself, “they would be such a great boyfriend,” but I just don’t see them in that way, nor do I think I ever will. It’s the whole “they will find an awesome girl one day…that girl is just not me.”

Adelina Medrano, a student at Cal State University of Fullerton, believes that it is harder to get out of the friend zone when you are friends with them to begin with. She believes it would take a lot of time before you can develop feelings other than friendship for that person.

The friend zone seems to be an unspoken understanding. You don’t ever really ask the question “am I in the friend zone?” You can tell when the other person doesn’t view you as much more. They’ll say things like “you are like a brother/sister and/or family to me.” Once you are compared to family, that pretty much seals the friend zone deal.

Daniel Martinez, a student at Fullerton College, has his own theory on the friend zone. “Its sooo easy to get out of the friend zone,” says Martinez.

He believes that most guys are in the friend zone because they never tell the girl their intentions or how they really feel, thus leading the girl to believe that they are just friends. He says that a lot of guys think that the girl will eventually get the hint, or in time she will start to like him.

Have you ever asked a male why guys are so confusing and have them respond with, asking why girls are so confusing? This is because in reality we are all confusing and we can’t seem to help it. Often it’s hard to read the opposite sex and tell what they are thinking or how they view you. Many people are afraid of being open and vulnerable just to be denied. Martinez may be correct in that no one wants to be the first one to fess up about their feelings.

In the end it just seems to depend on the type of person you are. Many people think they’re friends as strictly friends, nothing more, nothing less. Others have that flirty friendship that can potentially lead to more but may also be just a game. It seems as though the friend zone has always been and will always be a very confusing concept to understand and may never be figured out.